Faith

Opened Doors

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“And to the angel of the church in Philadelphia write, ‘These things says He who is holy, He who is true, “He who has the key of David, He who opens and no one shuts, and shuts and no one opens” : (Revelation 3:7 NKJV)

Recently I had a great conversation with Rev. H. Frank Centrallo, my father in the ministry. As usual, he shared a nugget of wisdom with me that helped me put things in the right perspective. He paraphrased Revelation 3:7 and said “God opens and closes the door of opportunity, not us. Our job is only to walk through the door. We can’t force it open when He’s decided to close it.”

As I accept the closed doors in my life and look to the future of my life, family, ministry, and business, his statement reminds me to allow God to be my guide. Here are some things we can learn from this verse.

God can be trusted.
God is holy and true. There is no one like him, full of wisdom and knowledge, who always wants what’s best for us. This why God can be trusted. He doesn’t have an alternative agenda that only benefits himself. In every situation, good or bad, God is working things out for our good.

God has the key.
The “key of David” is a figurative term that symbolizes royal authority. As a sovereign king, there are no areas of the kingdom where his influence isn’t permitted. As citizens of God’s kingdom, we can rest assure God has complete access to every area that concerns us. God can unlock any prison that binds us, open any opportunity to bless us, and lock the doors to our lives so the enemy can’t harm us.

God’s power is absolute.
There is a song that says “what God has for me, it is for me.” When we consider how he opens doors that no one shuts and closes doors no one may open, it should give us hope. The opportunities God will open for us cannot be taken by anyone, no matter how powerful they may seem. Conversely, closed opportunities cannot be opened to us no matter how hard we try.  God uses opened and closed doors to guide us on a path to our future.

We must learn to trust his judgement at each door of opportunity whether open or closed. We must have confidence in his authority and power as he acts on our behalf. When we lean and depend on him, we will find we’re right where we’re supposed to be.

Guard Your Heart

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Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. (Proverbs 4:23 NKJV)

Lately the pressures of family, ministry, work, and school have caused my emotions to spill outward. The interesting thing is most of what’s coming out isn’t new. It’s all old feelings that I’ve tried to bury in my heart through the years. As I’m going through these experiences, I’ve resolved to do my best to express my feelings rather than suppress them. Honestly, this decision has made my mind clearer and my heart lighter. Here’s how you can do it too. 

Keep or guard your heart. It means to be aware of your heart and feelings. It means to pay attention to your emotional state. To guard your heart well, you’ll need a healthy and accurate emotional vocabulary. You need to know the subtle differences between anger, frustration, and disappointment for example and know when you’re feeling each one. This will give you the ability to address your feelings correctly rather than waiting for them to fade and take up residence in your heart. 

Guard your heart with diligence. The word used for diligence here in the scripture literally means to imprison or jail. Years ago I directed a ministry to a juvenile detention facility. One of the first things you learn is security seeks to keep inmates from going out but they’re just as diligent about monitoring what’s brought inside. Everyday items like paper clips, staples, and even plastic cutlery could be used by detainees to harm themselves or harm the officers. There was always a strong officer on duty ready to search any bags if needed.

We must have the same diligence when it comes to our hearts. The baggage of everyday life has to be checked at the door by a strong dose of truth from God’s word and consistent prayer. Discouragement, depression, anger, hatred, unforgiveness, and any thing else you can think of just walks right into our hearts when there is no truth with which to compare it. When these emotional challenges get a foothold in our hearts, they eventually become our issues in life. Under the right circumstances with the right pressure, they flow out of us in ways that hurt others and ourselves. 

When we guard our hearts, keeping damaging emotions out by accepting the truth of God’s word, we will find the issues of life are easier to deal with. Instead of our hearts being a source of negative issues, we will become a source of healthy, positive attitudes and emotions.

Awesome Kids

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I recently took our daughter, Faith to the dentist. Everyone in the office, the dentist, assistants, and clerk all commented on how great Faith was during the visit. The clerk told me “she’s an awesome kid”. I replied with “both my kids are awesome.” The clerk said “I never hear parents say that about their kids anymore.” So I shared with her four things Melissa and I tried to do with our kids that I believe God used to make them awesome. Let me share them with you.

We gave them the gift of our presence.
“The rod and rebuke give wisdom, But a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.” Proverbs 29:15

Parenting is a contact sport. You can’t mold kids from a distance. You can’t just be a spectator watching the TV raise them. Children left to themselves bring their parents shame (out of control, poor character, lack of values, unsupervised activities and vices, etc.) So we tried to always be there for our kids and be there with our kids. We made a sacrifice to always have one of us parents at home. Many families can’t afford to do this in today’s economy but when you’re at home, be available and engaged. Watch movies with your kids, play games with them, talk with them. Even if you won’t play the game, sit with them while they play and watch them. We did this just last night when DeVonti came home to visit. He and Faith played video games while Melissa and I watched and engaged with them.

We kept an opened door.
“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4

We never tried to provoke our kids or put them their place. Everyone knew their roles in the family. It was never us against them. So everyone has a voice that should be heard. We may not have always agreed but they never really felt they needed to hide anything from us because they knew they would be heard. Because of this, our kids know they can talk to us about anything. We’ve talked about mistakes, victories, likes and dislikes, dating, sex, social life, finances, and just about any other topic. The door swings both ways. When we make mistakes we swallow our pride, go to our kids and apologize to them. Seeing our example, they too come to us to apologize for their mistakes.

We welcomed their friends.
“Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels.” Hebrews 13:2

DeVonti was always bringing home “strays”. These were kids who needed a ride home, or needed a place to hang after football practice, or guys who just wanted to spend the weekend at our house. As parents we were happy with this because we never had to wonder what trouble he was getting into. He was at home with his friends which gave us the opportunity to examine the character of his friends and converse with him later about how to choose friends wisely. Yes, it was expensive trying to feed his friends. Yes, they stayed up super late making all kinds of noise, making a good night’s sleep impossible. Yes, our schedules were inconvenienced. But they were safe in our home, abiding by our rules, being impacted by Godly values.

We set up memorial.
“Then you shall answer them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord; when it crossed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. And these stones shall be for a memorial to the children of Israel forever.” Joshua 4:7

Anytime God blessed our family in any way, we paused to make a memory. Any time we faced a challenge, we paused to point it out so once we overcame the challenge we could acknowledge God and make a memory. Our lives are filled with “remember when God did…”. We were also quick to point out positive values and character mistakes that occurred around us. We didn’t just assume they knew better when they saw an athlete or celebrity do things that weren’t positive. We took time to compare it to godly values. This allowed our kids to have a healthy framework for discerning right and wrong.

What are some principles you’ve used to help raise awesome kids?

More Than Enough

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Remember, dear brothers and sisters, that few of you were wise in the world’s eyes or powerful or wealthy when God called you. Instead, God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And he chose things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. God chose things despised by the world, things counted as nothing at all, and used them to bring to nothing what the world considers important. As a result, no one can ever boast in the presence of God. (1 Corinthians 1:26-29 NLT)

I have a hero complex brought on by watching movies and reading comics as a kid. Even when I dream at night I carry a light saber, I can fly, and I’ve got my own bat cave. When I’m awake I secretly seek to reach some epic victory in life or arrive at some great destiny as I fade into happily ever after. I’m a winner and that’s how super hero winners think sometimes.

All delusions aside; here’s the truth. I may never be the “save the universe” guy but I’m just enough for whatever God needs me to do. I’m not the smartest, strongest, best looking, or most respected in my sphere of influence. If we’re honest, none of us have it all together. We’re just normal, natural people who are happy to know The Lord chose us personally.

It’s God who gives us significance. It’s his standard of righteousness that makes us look so good. His holiness in our lives makes us special compared to the rest of the world. His grace gives us strength in our weaknesses. His favor swings doors open wide so we can seize opportunities. Alone, we’re just enough but when God adds his super to our natural, together, we’re more than enough.

A Prayer for Leaders

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Lord,

Empower your leaders with personal integrity. Let their authenticity cause others to trust in their leadership. Give them a desire to become leaders worth following. Give them the energy and physical wellness necessary to carry out their daily responsibilities. Grant them healthy habits in life and work. Help them find positive techniques for dealing with stress. Teach them to embrace seasons of rest.

Help them to nurture their families. Surround them with genuine, dependable, and honest friends. Bring balance in their lives. Remove blemishes in their character and vices in their lifestyles. Grant them passionate tenacity for their leadership coupled with sincere personal humility.

Remind them of their humanity even as they work with their teams to complete projects that are greater than themselves. Instill in them the necessity of personal development. Put people, resources, and opportunities in their path to build their leadership abilities. Inspire them to be life long learners as leaders.

Give them genuine care and concern for the people they lead. Give them versatility to lead unique personalities across cultural barriers and multiple generations of workers. Give them the courage to develop other leaders without fear of losing their positions. Help them to not be intimidated by those who appear to be more competent or talented than themselves. Let then acknowledge and face their insecurities while trusting in you, Lord.

Help them be moldable like children when faced with changes in their industries. Help them face challenges within their teams with hopeful resolve. Help them make their calling and purpose sure. Lord, lead your leaders to fulfill the visions you’ve purposed in their vocations. Make their organizations better because of their influence. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Be Great Followers

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Bondservants, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in sincerity of heart, as to Christ; not with eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, with goodwill doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free. (Ephesians 6:5-8 NKJV)

One of my favorite coaches is Bill Parcels. He is a great leader who has turned around several NFL teams. He has enjoyed the personal success of winning two Super Bowls and was recently inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame. But more impressive is the success of his followers. Bill Belichick, Tom Coughlin, and Sean Payton all served under Parcels and were all given opportunities to be head coaches. All three of these coaches have gone on to win Super Bowls: Belichick (3), Coughlin (2), and Payton (1). Good followers like these coaches embrace the instruction and molding provided by their leaders.

In Ephesians 6 Paul stresses the importance of servants following well. He reveals how following well, even when the leader isn’t around, is representative of our service to Christ. In our world of managers and employees or leaders and staff members, the ability to follow well is an indicator of leadership potential. Great leaders are first great followers.

People who follow well exhibit respect for authority and buy-in to the leader’s vision. Leaders know they can trust these followers and may exercise that trust by delegating greater responsibilities to them. This benefits the leader because it increases their overall reach and influence. It benefits the follower by giving them tangible experiences. As the leader experiences more success, those who follow well will be given their own opportunities to lead.

Paul says “knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free.” (Ephesians 6:8 NKJV) If we serve well, we will in turn be served well. If we support our leaders and make our teams successful, the same will happen for us when it’s our time to lead. If we follow our leaders well, we will find our efforts will make both the leader and ourselves successful.

How can following your leader contribute to your personal success?

Functioning with Fear

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praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints— and for me, that utterance may be given to me, that I may open my mouth boldly to make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains; that in it I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak. (Ephesians 6:18-20 NKJV)

In his letter to the church at Ephesus, Paul acknowledges his need to continue to function as an ambassador for Christ. The problem is, he’s in chains because of his boldness and is surrounded by opposition. He needed a little help to overcome the impulse to remain silent. So he asks the church to pray for him to receive inspiration and boldness so he can speak about Christ as he ought to speak.

When we face challenges our natural reactions are either fight or flight. We either attack the source of our fears to save ourselves or we run from our fears to avoid them all together. I’d like to submit a third option; continue to function with fear. Don’t go on the attack. Don’t run and hide. Continue to do what needs to be done even though you’re afraid.

Here is an example from history. Centuries ago people believed the world was flat. Looking out over the horizon, sailors believed if they went too far out to sea they would fall off the edge of the world. Then finally, explorers ventured into the uncharted waters and proved the world was round. I’m sure there were sailors aboard those ships who were afraid. They were able to endure and overcome their fears and carry out their functions even while afraid. They were afraid but still gathered their supplies. They were afraid but they still boarded the ship. They were afraid of falling off the world but still raised their sails.

Paul’s life was in danger for sharing his faith but he still asks the church to pray for him to carry out his mission. Today we can learn from his example and seek the help of the Lord and other believers so we can function in the face of fear. Prayer, support, and inspiration from the Lord can strengthen our hearts in the face of oppositions and challenges. We may fear rejection but still ask. We may fear failure but still try. We fear losses but still take risks. As we move forward with God in the face of our fears, we will realize he won’t let us fall.

Pick A Street

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Josiah was eight years old when he became king, and he reigned thirty-one years in Jerusalem. And he did what was right in the sight of the Lord, and walked in the ways of his father David; he did not turn aside to the right hand or to the left. For in the eighth year of his reign, while he was still young, he began to seek the God of his father David; and in the twelfth year he began to purge Judah and Jerusalem of the high places, the wooden images, the carved images, and the molded images. (II Chronicles 34:1-3 NKJV)

While on vacation in another city, I ventured out to pick up breakfast for the family. As I listened to the directions from the GPS I looked over and noticed I’d passed the restaurant even though the GPS voice was still instructing me to keep my current course. Staying the course wouldn’t get me there. I needed to change course. All I needed to do was turn off the GPS, and pick a street where I could turn around.

Judah was headed toward destruction with poor leadership from previous kings. King Josiah knew his country wouldn’t rebound if they stayed on the path of idolatry. They needed to change course and serve The Lord. So Josiah chose the path his people needed to journey toward their recovery. Beginning with himself, he did what was right in the sight of The Lord and walked in the ways of David, a man after God’s heart.

Then Josiah did something to make change stick: he turned off the GPS (poor leadership from previous kings) and stayed focussed on the change. He didn’t get off the path to change. He didn’t turn to the right hand or the left. .

Many of us see the need for change in our personal, professional, and public lives. If we think we’re going to do what we’ve always done, better than before and see significant change, we’re insane. Doing what we’ve always done led us to the need for change but it will never lead to change itself. We need to pick a new street and turn off the flawed thinking and guidelines that got us here.

What new path do you need to choose? What ways of thinking do you need to turn off?

Forgiven Much

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Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little.” (Luke 7:47 NKJV)

I’ve made plenty of mistakes in my life that required my wife and children to forgive me. Here’s a truth I’ve learned as they’ve forgiven me time and time again: love is the key to being forgiven. Jesus reveals two truths about love and forgiveness I’d like to share today.

The more we are forgiven, the more we will love.

One of the marks of a mature believer is their awareness of their own sins. As we spend more time applying scripture to our lives, the Holy Spirit make us keenly aware of the areas of our lives that fail to line up with God’s will.

When we truly comprehend the magnitude and consequences of our wrong doings, forgiveness becomes more valuable to us. It’s meaning is amplified in our hearts. When we receive forgiveness from God, we express our love for him with humility and thankfulness. We love him because he first loved us, he sent Jesus to pay the penalty for our sins, and he has forgiven us.

The more we love, the more we will forgive.

When our daughter, Faith, was very young she was a natural at love and forgiveness. If Melissa and I argued or disagreed, Faith would interrupt us by saying “mama I love you” and “daddy I love you”. We would respond by saying “we love you too”. We couldn’t stay angry with each other after expressing sincere love for our daughter. It was like Faith was reminding us that we loved each other. That feeling of love helped us forgive each other.

Forgiveness is an act of love. God loved the world through Jesus. Its a love strong enough to forgive any sin. Each time we forgive others we’re saying we love them more than the hurt we received from their wrong doing. If you’re having difficulty forgiving others, it won’t be resolved by waiting on them to do something to appease your feelings. Your ability to forgive is directly dependent on your love toward them. Begin by loving them with the love of God.

And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.” (I Peter 4:8 NKJV)

To forgive much we must love much. Who’s mistakes do you need to cover with love?

The Beginning of Change

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Josiah was eight years old when he became king, and he reigned thirty-one years in Jerusalem. And he did what was right in the sight of the Lord, and walked in the ways of his father David; he did not turn aside to the right hand or to the left. For in the eighth year of his reign, while he was still young, he began to seek the God of his father David; and in the twelfth year he began to purge Judah and Jerusalem of the high places, the wooden images, the carved images, and the molded images. (II Chronicles 34:1-3 NKJV)

Josiah would eventually lead the greatest turnaround in the history of Judah. The country would change its spiritual direction away from idolatry and toward The Lord. Even though Josiah had positional authority to make any changes he desired, the true spark of change was ignited within himself first.

Leading change always starts within leaders who are changing.

Those who lead successful change in their families, communities, and organizations, understand they must develop themselves to make change stick. People can believe in change when they see leaders who are constantly striving to change for the better. Continual personal development ensures we will be leaders worth following.

At the age of sixteen Josiah began to develop himself by seeking God. By age twenty he began making changes to turn the kingdom around. What areas do you need to develop personally to help bring change to the organization or team you lead?